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Pray for a home run baby

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  1. Who needs another blog?


    This isn’t my first blog. Not even my first one in English. But here I am, in NYC, trying to live life well while learning about it. Thoughts keep bubbling up as I soak myself in the city, in psychoanalytic training, and



    in my own swirling experiences. So, I thought: why not write something for a wished-for audience? People who might look upon my journey and insights with care, curiosity, maybe even a little amusement. That said, I promise not to ruin my life just for the clicks—not that I’d know which way to crash to get them.


  2. Why Everything Bagel?


    I named this blog Everything Bagel because it feels like a fitting metaphor for the Promise of America. It’s the idea of being able to do everything, or at least attempt to, and maybe even make it the best. The name also carries a deeper, more personal resonance.


    One of my esteemed colleagues back home, Dr. Yehuda Israeli, once used a relatable metaphor to explain Lacanian psychoanalysis:

    A bagel goes to therapy, complaining about the hole inside it. After a long course of analysis, it realizes that without the hole, it would just be a bun.


    The moral? -In Lacanian terms, we learn to own our problems. They become part of our identity—personal, specific, and essential to our being. Without them, we risk being meaninglessly empty inside, lacking the character our imperfections give us.


    Now, take that bagel and add Christopher Bollas’s concept of hysteria: a state of an overabundance that masks an absence of inner core. Suddenly, you’ve got not just any bagel, but a black hole in the center of it. I like the idea of an emergent self, becoming out of nothing, forming out of influences and trauma, organizing out of a pattern of working around the existential core, happening out of constituting actions or inactions, cohering out of completing opposites.



  3. Home run!

    Usually, my mind usually works in flips and twists, always trying to capsize what ever raft of thoughts I'm supposed to be assembling.

    This, I found, is not the American way. Making solid, straightforward arguments, showing clear thinking, and owning my weirdness rather than catapulting it on someone else to catch, are more appreciated here.

    I think learning how to ground, even, and extend my thinking in straight, patient lines would be good for me. It's like building serious train tracks instead of a bumping cars ride. I want my thinking to go that far before it flips on itself. To make a closing surprising argument, rather that being stuck in a second paragraph that undermines the first.

    I know baseball only as an American film trope. But I'm going to use this metaphor. I want to be able to load my bases before I swing for a home run.




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